5 tips for getting intimate over the holidays
13th December 2018
Did you know that, according to UK National Birth Statistics, more babies are conceived in the weeks leading up to and days after Christmas than any other time of the year? If you’re planning to get pregnant, read these top tips for how you can get intimate over the festive period.
Lots of couples report that sex can become routine and monotonous while they’re trying to conceive, rather than passionate, spontaneous and fun. With the ‘scheduling’ of sex around the most ‘fertile time’, along with the pressure to conceive and low mood leading to decreased sexual interest, it’s hardly surprising. But, we know that this can have a really negative impact on a couple’s sex life, with one in three couples experiencing sexual difficulties during fertility treatment – it’s also one of the areas that is talked about the least.
So, as the dark nights are drawing in and days are getting colder, what better way to make the most of the holidays than by trying out these top 5 tips for getting intimate. The chilly weather may also mean that sperm quality is higher, too – a bonus!
- Make time for each other:
It’s hard to rekindle your sex life if your emotional health and wellbeing isn’t at its best, and you’re focusing much of your life, routine and conversations on planning to get pregnant. The festive period can be busy and hectic, especially if you’re catching up with friends and family – but try and commit to spending some time alone to do the things you love, just the two of you. This will be a great way to connect over the things that brought you together.
2. Talk about sex:
It can feel embarrassing talking about sex with a partner – but having a conversation about how you would like your sex life to be is the first step towards doing things differently.
3. Be flexible with the rules:
You’ll have received tons of tips for trying to conceive from both professionals and your own research about what to do to get pregnant. Remember, though, that having a routine doesn’t mean you can’t still have sex whenever and wherever the moment takes you. Be kind and understanding with yourself if you’re not in the mood to have sex on ‘ovulation day’. You may find that by not focusing so much on ovulation and fertility, your libido will increase!
4. Invest in foreplay:
There are many different ways to have sex and be sexual and although penetration is the only way to get pregnant – it should be part of a wider package. Build in time for seduction, foreplay and sensual activity. Giving and receiving massages or taking a bath together can be a helpful way to build intimacy ahead of intercourse. Studies have shown that when couples massage each other for 20 minutes, twice a week, it can lead to improved couple relationship and individual emotional wellbeing (which is a great excuse for a massage!).
5. Mix it up!
Do you always have sex before you go to sleep? Could that be when you’re most tired? Do you always have sex in the same position or place? Make the most of any time off or away that you have over the next few weeks, while you’re feeling well rested, to mix it up and trying something new.
This post is a summary of a longer module in Adia’s FREE 12-week fertility health plan. To see the whole plan just sign up.
Article written in association with our brilliant advisor Dr. Camilla Rosan, a chartered consultant clinical psychologist and couple therapist.